How I became once more a child

Someone told me many years ago: "Aga please never grow up". It was the time when I was in secondary school (high-school), I was the biggest idealist you could ever seen and I was celebrating my 6th birthday every year, because I didn't want to grow up. In the end of my secondary school I got a diploma with the text "for doing things, which everybody though are impossible". I am still proud of this and it is still hanging on my wall. With the small change I have already grown up.

I was awsome times when everything was possible, everyone loved each other and we had heads full of amazing ideas. We believed in friendship, love, peace, true, ut most important we believed that in the future we would be those happy people we want to be - idealists.

It is right now almost 6 years since I have finished my secondary school. For most of this time I was working, studying, travelling and doing many other things. During this time I just forgot the person I used to be. I am not saying that I changed so much, because I done many this which most probably I would do anyway. Rather I stopped thinking like I used to think.

Well someone might claim that being idealist is stupid, somehow I agree after my own experience. But it was so amazing to met few people who used to be like me few years ago and who shown me how the smallest things can make U so happy.

If u wanna get back to the times when u used to dream, it is a perfect song for u:

How it is just before everything ends...

I should study right now, I have important final on Wednesday, but still I can invest the next 15 minutes to think about coming back home.

Tonight during the dinner, one of my firends said something about the party tonight. Someone mention - yes, we have someting to celebrate; and I realized that today was my last day of classes. It is the end. Just 2 more exams and thats all! I was pritty surprised.

How do I feel? This time is different. From the very beginning I knew that it will be like holidays, that I should not get close to people because I will never see them again (this happen for the first time, because before I always knew I will meet them soon). I have treated this stay as something out of my reality and from the first day I was trying to enjoy everything, not to regret after.

Right now I have 8 days to go. I don't feel it, I am not sad that I am leaving, because I still didn't realized it. Only one thing which proof that soon I am coming back to reality (my life in Poland) is that I started planning. I know when my university is open and when I have to be there, I know when my teachers have office hours and I know when my friends are at home.

I know one thing - I cannot get sentimental! I cannot miss this place and spend to much time on thinking about what I would do if I would be there. Usually I am getting on plane, coming back from somewhere and this is enough to move my experience to the past, not live with the past, move to this what is in the future. Hopefully it will happen as well this time. I don't know... What I know for sure is - I have a lot of things to do in Poland, and still I have to find out what to do with my life:)

Various thoughts from my last days

Honestly I have so many things to write about, so many memories in my head and still so many questions... but I don't have time to do it right now.



Today was my last day of classes and by accident I had my first final. I am leaving US on 18th of December, and this place most probably on 17th... I still have two finals and two papers to write, and a lot of upcoming parties. I have to say goodbye to everyone and I think I just want to enjoy my last day as much as possible not to regret after.

The purpose of this entry is to make a list of all things I want to write after coming back home (less then 10 days!). Here in US i finally learn how to write papers so hopefully right now there will be less stupid gramar mistakes.

So soon I will work on the following topics:

1. Why the small college in Arkansas was awsome
2. How I build the amazing and loving family at Hendrix
3. What happen when someone has birthsday
4. I don't like american movies
5. What does it mean "to become americanized"
6. I still have bad luck while travelling
7. Singing in arabic, on the streets of Chicago and other stuff
8. My awsome teachers - it was really cool
9. How it is to have roomate
10. What I like about America: classic rock (and maybe I will find some other things)
11. History of VZ 101
12. Model UN - one of the best experiences ever
13. Why I love asian people
14. What does it mean: drinking like americans
15. Imagine - there are a lot of dreamers...
16. Studying in US
17. The elections and a bit more about politics
18. "Winter wonderland" - when I was in Christmas mood
19. My dear friends
20. ... and many more

I will have a lot of time to write, because I have no plans for Christmas and New Years Eve, besides meeting with few friends who will stay in Wroclaw for break, I will have nothing to do...

So u r more then welcome to visit my blog around Christmas time


... and this is my new hair cut :)